Dream Dark Stories

Tag: s***

  • Day One Hundred & Sixty-Seven, June 15th, 2024

    Hi-ho and Hello.

    Jesus, trying to catch up, it’s like aiming on catching salmon with my teeth. I’ll get it, I’m just needing to adjust, what with the new meds, once I’ve got it figured all should be set and just.

    But. And it’s a small but, but there’s something to that medication comment above. It’s not that it isn’t working, it’s not that I’m not noticing positive symptoms, it’s that when I have a moment…I retreat into the deep recesses of my mind, I don’t move. I go further and deeper into that area that I find myself nearly stuck.

    Whether this will continue is yet to be seen but I’m writing a bit more again and I’d take that as a good note.

    How about you? Do you see things as good when they’re good or does it need to be perfect? Or good enough?

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you for the support, and coming back again.

    Been off and sick somewhat…til tomorrow.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty-Four, May 23rd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    I should have more than what I have, more written that is, life is I wouldn’t say crazy, I wouldn’t say anything insane, it’s grasping it in the right place that’s difficult. You hear people say “grab the bull by its horns”, come back to me after you try. Let me know how that goes.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’d try at it, give it a go, know what I mean? Maybe. You think about it, and logistically speaking, grabbing a bowl by its horns, there are so many outcomes where I’d rather take the time investigating the possibility in numbers of what can happen than actually face a repercussions. I’ve seen a few men’s faces I’ve been smashed by a bull’s horns that’s not something I want. There was this guy JR, back in the day married and divorced an auntie of mine. And another guy whose name I can’t recall but he did his face didn’t mean a bull his face meant a tree trunk like one of the pieces of the lower branches thick his face ran into that in the darkness riding an ATV. Doesn’t seem like something that I would happen to appreciate happening in my life. At least people I’ve seen has stated above didn’t seem like they were all hunky dory all the time. Anyway I know this is short brief no music today I am realizing I’m wasting too much time making playlists, and trying to figure out what I’m going to say that it’s I’m losing myself and what I’m trying to bring to the blog and I apologize for that.

    Don’t get me started on apologies. That’s a spell of its own.

    But that’s all I have today, I’ll get back into the pillars tomorrow and the day after I think I was supposed to do that today, but sometimes I forget.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you fantastic supporters and readers till tomorrow, may the night, may the morning, may the day be grace.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Four, May 3rd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Life, individuation, the first pillar, Jung, my head, Jung, again, my head, Jung , Jung, Jung, look a wall.

    Today, well, it’s a day where I’m going to take a moment to myself and reflect while I share some poetry and a playlist of favorites from Spotify. Enjoi!

    Seashells

    I remember the seashells, I remember the cold surface cupped against my ear, my mother asking if I can hear… If I can hear an ocean deep.

    I remember the seashells, I remember the cold surface, an echoed hollow of something distant, something nearing being forgotten, I remember.

    I remember the seashells, that cold surface, and a question that came with a known white lie, I remember nodding to a sound I didn’t know, something distant, something but forgotten, I remember.

    I remember the seashells, but it’s something new, something small, I remember the seashells and their distant whisper of lyrics sung but only to me, I remember a different shell, this with sound, I remember.

    M. R. Vega

    Change

    Calm the solutions, claim to negligence, absolve the blame.

    The furrow of furies, a billowed worry, the calm to recoiled delights

    Shame the differences, accuse the anguish, flavors missed, the ears suppressed. Mute. Mute. Mute and Scream.

    M. R. Vega

    Fuzzy Fury

    Confusion.

    I was here, now I’m gone, but then I was here again. Wait. What? I was here, now I’m gone, but then again I was here. Again.

    A testament to this in a breaking brain, how the routine, disarray of the ADHD, a fragmented space of matter, missing, chunks, white, evanesce, to blank, the gray, eroded, the black, gone, gone, gone.

    My favorites!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Three, May 2nd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    The last few nights I’ve found myself just staring off. I’ll kiss the wife good night, tuck in my son beside her. I say goodnight to the both of them, lay down on my small cot, and stare off to the droll of the darkness, and this has been happening for days, maybe even weeks now. I’m certainly losing track of time.

    The other day I went to bed at 1:30 in the morning, woke up at 4:00 a.m., wide awake, having to somewhat force myself back to sleep but it’s not sleep it’s more just a fruitless, fretting, tossing, turning, and that’s not the first of that type of sleep, it’s been like this for years now.

    And this, my reader, is the biggest reason why I’ve come wanting to address Carl Jung and the Five Pillars of happiness. I’ve been rather ignorant with my understanding of what depression is, trying to address it as though I’m just moody, I’m just not feeling well, under the weather, but that hollow sensation is right there. I would love to say that it’s fleeting, that it’s not a concern, that I am okay. But that’s a laugh, innit?

    Before I close out and drop my playlist which isn’t all that long, as a reader what are your five pillars of happiness for you? One of my biggest which I have yet to address and will likely be addressing next week will be art, writing, and making sure to attribute those two things to balancing the issues at hand. Of course this will take time to address, to acknowledge, to delegate, and understand but I hope through sharing art, sharing perspectives, sharing more of the whole, the idea of who and what Dream Dark Stories is going to be will come.

    Hand drawn, I figured AI had to go.
    What I Made…
    …through the night…
    …staring off into the darkness, using the TV light to mold and blend.
    Enjoi!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. I do hope you well, hope the day is blissful and the night gentle. Stay safe.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day Sixty-Three, March 3rd, 2024

    Hi ho and hello.

    Ever have those days where you could swear you smell like s*** and you likely have crap running down your leg or remaining from a bad bathroom moment earlier that morning?

    I did that today. I grabbed my dogs this morning, a little later than I intended, because well I was being lazy and then the smaller one started barking more incessantly than usual, finally I got my cranky ass up, grabbed em, took them outside and got them fed. And I could have swore that somehow at some moment throughout the morning I had crappe myself and forgot. I had gone all day sniffing the air like a psycho thinking that there was just immediate s*** directly in front of me beside me underneath me above me somewhere had to be f****** somewhere.

    Turns out the smaller pup got a tummy ache ended up kind of losing his bowels and I apparently just didn’t catch the smell or even the muck on his bed before picking him up and taking him outside. So that got on my finger, I put my hand and my pocket smearing said s*** down into my jean pocket and on to my jeans.

    So I had not shot myself, but I did put s*** on myself, completely unaware of doing so but that’s where the snow is coming from and somehow I just completely missed it I don’t know how because my jeans are blue and s*** is you know well it’s the color of s***. Sorry for cussing so much in this one it was dealing with a circumstance that kind of called for it right?

    So that pretty much sums up my day. I had s*** on me all day and didn’t know. Pretty much grasps the daily muckery of the chaos that happens we tend to overlook I guess. But I do hope that my submission for school comes with an A and that my submission for lit up tomorrow morning comes with good news.

    C’est la vie

    Good night and good morning, have a glorious good morning and darling good night.

    Nosce Te Ipsum