Dream Dark Stories

Tag: life

  • Day One Hundred & Forty-Five, May 24th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    So today may be a bit testy, to address pillar one and two of Carl Jung’s goals for happiness, I have some thoughts.

    And these, hopefully are well received thoughts.

    Now, to say that one should figure out who they are first, to then find love, successes, and to start dreaming, knowing who you/they are and understanding who that is, is certainly a fundamental aspect of life. However, it’s not something that can be figured out in just a day. It’s not something that takes or can be figured out within a matter of a week or two. I feel a lot of us rush, and a lot of us aim for adulthood, being progressive and moving ahead quickly enough that you’re not falling on your face. I feel that a lot of us are kind of in this perpetual ouroboros that has the same effect, that end, that same start, again and again. And then we just keep choosing to see it as something else because we don’t want to make the steps of change.

    Because the matter of fact is, life is time consuming and life is time. Everything takes time. This means those people you love, the people that you’re close to, that you’re tight with, it is time that you take the time to know who they are. To know who you are because of them, to know how you affect them, to know that you matter for them towards them and about them. And this isn’t some kind of manipulative psycho baby reindeer kind of way, it’s just a matter of showing the people that matter, that you give a f***.

    I don’t know, there’s something that matters there in being present, even if just for a moment. Saying hello, maybe giving a quick hug, hand shake, blowing a kiss or signing thank you at one another. There’s something about that personable transaction among people that gets me giddy. How could it not? The world, as dark as it’s been lately, is a cherished piece of life, and chance, hope and prospect, and I hang to the virtues that are within these because I think humanity can be good, but I also feel that it’s a matter of opinion. A matter of wanting it or denying it.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you kind readers and supporters, til tomorrow, may the night and day be blissful, cherished and bright!

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty-Four, May 23rd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    I should have more than what I have, more written that is, life is I wouldn’t say crazy, I wouldn’t say anything insane, it’s grasping it in the right place that’s difficult. You hear people say “grab the bull by its horns”, come back to me after you try. Let me know how that goes.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’d try at it, give it a go, know what I mean? Maybe. You think about it, and logistically speaking, grabbing a bowl by its horns, there are so many outcomes where I’d rather take the time investigating the possibility in numbers of what can happen than actually face a repercussions. I’ve seen a few men’s faces I’ve been smashed by a bull’s horns that’s not something I want. There was this guy JR, back in the day married and divorced an auntie of mine. And another guy whose name I can’t recall but he did his face didn’t mean a bull his face meant a tree trunk like one of the pieces of the lower branches thick his face ran into that in the darkness riding an ATV. Doesn’t seem like something that I would happen to appreciate happening in my life. At least people I’ve seen has stated above didn’t seem like they were all hunky dory all the time. Anyway I know this is short brief no music today I am realizing I’m wasting too much time making playlists, and trying to figure out what I’m going to say that it’s I’m losing myself and what I’m trying to bring to the blog and I apologize for that.

    Don’t get me started on apologies. That’s a spell of its own.

    But that’s all I have today, I’ll get back into the pillars tomorrow and the day after I think I was supposed to do that today, but sometimes I forget.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you fantastic supporters and readers till tomorrow, may the night, may the morning, may the day be grace.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty-Three, May 22nd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    The heat is starting to roll in.

    The days are struck with a burn that stands still, permeating through the soil, breathing through the walls. It leaves this desire to fly away, if only I had wings.

    I would like to address something having to do with my stories given the name o f the site is about just that.

    Part Three is being revisited as well as rewritten, I have Part Four also in lieu and tow. As I stated in previous posts, I am trying to take care of my mental health and trying to make sure that what I write isn’t a reflection of what I’m dealing with currently. But more the story that I’ve been writing and editing and rewriting since 2011. That said I am still creating art and more editing, and doing all else, I’m just trying to take care of myself and find the aspects that leave me with very little friendship. But that’s for another time, I’ll be back Thursday with more of an update depending on life.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May the night day and life be bliss, carry you to a new light. Thank you for the support and following.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty-Two, May 21st, 2024

    Hi-ho and Hello

    Let’s address mental health for a minute.

    As a 34 year old, I’m at the pivotal place within that I feel is in need and far past due for a resetting or at the least a re-evaluating of where my self is, and where I am mentally. What steps are needed to help the progression in myself.

    And I kind of laugh at that, the progression that is, because I am progressing further with the multiple sclerosis a more ominously obvious sense of progression.

    Maybe that’s just ghoulish humor, but so it goes.

    But, then I think of Carl Jung, and the pillars that I’m trying to grasp for myself to better whatever steps and motion I take to doing from here and out.

    Pillar one, though I feel I’ve gathered a good grasp of what pillar one means and making sure I am aware and well balanced with a cognizant tether and knowing what my body needs and that of health. So I do take care of my body, I stay hydrated, I eat a good amount of protein and though there are some areas within health, body, and mind that needs some tending I feel I’m getting a good grasp. I’ve got myself a therapist, I’ve got myself a new line of medication and vitamins to help with the MS, and for the first time in a long while, I am starting to see a positive outcome. Now when coming a second pillar though, that has a heavy hand and a sad hand.

    ENJOI!!!

    My friends are limited, they are certainly a small group if not a solo group, and though I’m not a lone wolf all the time, given my friend is an 85 year old man, I try not to bother him. I’m told it’s okay, “call whenever you want“, but at the same time I’m also coming to this understanding that less is more. And there is something gracious about that for me. On a personal level it’s something that I’m cherishing more and more, I don’t know maybe it’s feeling isolated and alone more and more that has me feeling spirited that way and seeing it in that type of light, but it is what it is and I’d rather wake up with a smile and a decent outlook then scowling at the Sun and Moon everyday.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you readers and supporters. Thank you and may the night and coming day be forever graced with joy and bliss.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty One, May 20th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Mondays, gotta love em, gotta hate em.

    I try to take each day as it is. Today though, I had everything prepped, the speakers were all charged, I had a set list of things I had wanted to tackle together, that is, with my daughter.

    Again this week is my venturing into discovery for and with ‘good or at least decent personal and intimate relationships, like my marriage, my family, and friends’.

    I wanted to have a fun time cleaning with my daughter who had recently graduated and had been staying with us to wrap up the school routine and graduation ceremonies, like calls for band time, awards ceremonies, busy busy.

    Sadly though, as I lament, she’d forgotten and then was called in for a band ceremony…that wasn’t for another six, maybe seven hours.

    I found myself cleaning alone, which didn’t leave me angry, just…let down, I guess.

    The thing is I had planned on having you know a congenial and authentic conversation about belief and spirituality, you know, the thoughts that circle around theories, ideas and life, the morals and ethical grounds.

    I genuinely wanted to have a good conversation while we cleaned. And the fact that that wasn’t able to be achieved was more than a let down than I had assumed or presumed would have happened.

    But that’s something else I’ve found, the times have changed, dramatically so, there has definitely seemed to be a rift that knocks off the “give a f***” type of attitude. That I think is the saddest prospect of what I’m saying, there is very little care about our actions affecting anybody else other than us, even I as a writer know that whatever I’m writing here can destroy or aid to those who read this. And I need to take accountability for that making sure my words at least have a direction and intention, like a promise.

    ENJOI!!!

    That’s life though, right? Sometimes you hope and the hopes give to a delight, other times you hope and nothing is brought to the table, to play is empty and stays empty. I guess the difference in being an adult is finding yourself unmoved, unaffected, and resolute still. So we’ll see how day three will be of my Carl Jungs – Pillar Two experiment.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. To all of you, I thank you, I appreciate you, I love the support, and thank you for coming time and again to see what my crazy ass is up to. Thank you.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Forty, May 19th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Well life doesn’t always go the way we expect, does it?

    As I have stated prior, today, the plan is to spend a good portion of my Sunday with my good friend John. This is the gentleman that I have been doing the Memoirs with, and the more and more we have been talking of life and the pursuit of just living, I’ve been reminiscent to the past of my own.

    I find myself grasping at straws and knowing bits but nothing to be matched to the magnitude of recalling a past like John does. 85 years, and he’s managed to collect most of the memories, unscathed, there’s names mentioned, with an ellipsis following, a showing of recollection just not a full scaled type.

    It’s been a pleasure watching him discover himself through writing while also finding moments of superlatives to be had, an aid to the emotion and the lamenting of those lost in his life. But he doesn’t hang his head low, he laughs at the sound of death, jokingly striking the conversation of fears that may encompass life and the next adventure as, ‘it is what it is’.

    It’s inspiring to watch an 85 year old man wanting to tell his story while also learning more about himself, learning the way he being who he was, is, and how it affects those around him matter.

    Today was just that, we talked. We talked of love, we talked to life, we did do a bit of planning for the memoirs, but overall it was just a communication between Friend and Friend.

    When looking at the second pillar and building upon it, while also maintaining an emotional value with an intimacy and empathy to those that are involved with us, is something that furthers that foundation. It stands at a balancing beam, aiding to the rectification of us.

    At least that’s what I’m discovering and this is just day one of the week for pillar two this may just be a week kind of ordeal, I am hoping to maybe plan having my brother come over where we can kind of incorporate the conversation to building that fortification, more talk, and a plan on having possibly a day with my wife involved on here, and hoping Monday turns out well but we’ll see I’m going to actually be dropping that sooner than later.

    ENJOI!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, Good morning and good night.

    May the night, the day, the hours in between cross your soul and bring the life forward moving forever toward being better.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Eight, May 17th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    I may be broke and broken, but at least I’ve got WordPress, my paints, and a tenacity that itches and digs.

    Side note: ADHD is a pain in the ass.

    As is MS, but to have the ADHD on top of that is a double whammy.

    And it’s certainly, if not obviously, getting worse, hah he he he…

    But anyhow, addressing Pillar two. It’s starting this coming week and already I have plans set with John for Sunday. But where we’ll end up I know not, I’m excited though, to see him and talk life, possibly even gander into the memoirs for a bit but…we’ll see.

    Monday, my daughter and I are having a cleaning day together (I know, so fun). I’m looking forward to the time, not having my boy getting huffy and needing things put back instantly and being able to clean up well, it is a fun prospect , 😮‍💨. If you knew how many times these plans are written, scribed and dated, and then nothing happens so… we’ll see. We’ll see how it goes. Fingers crossed.

    Tuesday is a family day, as we’re setting up for the Wonka festivities. My wife, the teacher, has been known to have a big shindig the past three years.

    She tends to go all out and it’s rather eventful. I’m excited to set it up with her, as it will be the last unless her plans change. Hahahaha, we’ll see though right?

    I hate that phrase; the “we’ll see” I feel is so presumptuous, almost alluding to a known or set and planned fail to the itinerary.

    Anyways, I apologize this is a very very very late post I am also going to be posting about some other mental health things and possibly addressing medications I’ll be maybe getting on I don’t know we’ll see how much I feel like sharing and how much I don’t. I guess it calls to being tactful right? But I will be posting this shortly, my playlist may be short as will my Sunday post which of course is my Saturday post.

    ENJOI!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May your day be joyous, and the night people. Thank you for your support stay safe, I’ll be back tomorrow.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Seven, May 16th 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Sometimes it just gets to the point where it’s too much, innit? Whether it be life, whether it be the juxtaposition of school and mind, the dichotomy of life and that of a spouse and you, friend, what have you? Leaving you where, what you’re wanting to do is crouch down, either clench and just squeeze your eyes shut till the silence coaxes the ears, the kind, the soul.

    It’s life though, innit. We put ourselves around the people we hope are good for us and that pair well with us; this though changes through the evolution in the self of each of us. 

    And though there may be some differences with change, some part far from what they were what they intended to become, and resort to a cool comfort that is complacency.

    Facing Pillar II under the guise of Jungian theories, I observe and watch, the biggest thing about this is this, I can’t change anyone but me, none of us can change anything but ourselves and how we react to life. Even through relationships, we have a choice, and a call to being accountable for our behaviours and actions.

    What I’m realizing is for the second pillar, it calls to that accountability I was mentioning. Who do you invest in time with, where are the flaws being seen, what is making moves with you and reacting in a positive manner? Find what brings light to you and yours what brings a positive reliance of each other together.

    ENJOI!!!

    I’ll tell you how it goes for me this next week while I reach out to those I do hold close to my heart even if they’re a distance away. Who are the ones where it’s like pulling teeth for conversation, who are the ones where it’s as if life just continued naturally, as if a cognizant relationship with being real connects the lines for you? I bid adieu. I’m very much late with wrapping this up, have a painting glaring at me as he’s not done yet.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night to you all, may the day to come the gentle breeze of the hours coax the heart gently caressing you into the night bliss of living.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Six, May 15th, 2024. w/Poems and Art

    By: Matthew R. Vega

    A Call

    By: M. R. Vega

    A call to compromise, to outweigh the solutions and sow the soils, to turn left and exit.

    A call to compromise, throw a  towel forget the heart and burn to ash.

    A call to compromise, shift the weight, play the counter, don’t trip, better not fucking trip.

    A call to compromise, did your heart wallow at the stake, did your worry clap and whisper a faint goodbye, that hollow salute?

    A call to compromise, did the teeth gnash at the tether of that moral compass.

    A call to compromise, how down, don’t question, don’t ask a thing, not a peep, make sure you’re ready.

    A call to compromise, never play facetious, always fastidious, salute and bow out.

    A call to compromise, don’t diss, don’t reminisce, the past is dead, work here, work now.

    A call to compromise, change the being, become the mold, fit the clay or a design that has been lost, remixed, thrown, raped, pillaged, fit the mold, find the clay, wear it well, it do you true.

    A call to compromise, don’t matter, try not to stutter, mistakes be gone, don’t ask a question, become the mold, fit the clay find the heart to the design.

    A call to compromise, toss the key, throw out the books toss your mind, sell the rest. Pay no mind to being true, a holding to you.

    A call to compromise, hear the screams, hear the gate. A call to compromise, where the heart is no more. A call to compromise, where the spirit cannibalized. A call to compromise, take away the being of true, the meaning of you.

    A call to compromise, feeling empty, feeling wanted, filling despondent, adrift, barren, bone, and breath.

    A call to compromise, give it all, let it be, give it all, give it all, give it all.

    Pour for the Mountains by: M. R. Vega
    Gorilla with a Pyramid by M. R. Vega
    Gorilla with a Pyramid by M. R. Vega, 3/4 angle mixed mediums, pour paint acrylic, resin, water colour.
    Mixed mediums. Enjoi !!!

    Walk

    By: M. R. Vega

    Go, go, go. I know your pain, I get the struggle, like Sisyphus and the stone, go, go, go. Take it to the street, to.

    Go to the streets, take to the walk, parallel the city lights and the perpetual motion of the living.

    I call the streets like a mandolin leaving breadcrumbs to follow, to inhale for a connect.

    Extrapolate the result, a weight to the worry, the heart, stop, stop, just take to a walk, get away.

    Go, go, go, feed your heart the flame of what licks and gnashes behind, let go from a past long lost, nothing meant to be repeated, resurrected, revived for consumption, gnash and gnaw talk to the walk, take to go, go, go.

    Go, go, go, permeate through the walls, let the salt and mire bore through, take to walk, parallel the city lights, inhale the perpetual motion of the living, and find a hollow ground.

    Go, go, go.

    Go. Get away.

    Who? By: M. R. Vega (in production, acrylic on black canvas)
    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May the joyous life of the world bless the heart extinguish the grief. May peace find you. Thank you.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Five, May 14th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Okie dokie everybody, this is going to be tonight’s documentation of exactly what is happening. My wife is fast asleep, the teenager/child/person-who-thinks-they-are-an-adult, and my little guy are also fast asleep. As a matter of fact, even the dogs are asleep, I am now outside in the shed, quietly smoking, with music softly playing. Unbeknownst to me my neighbors (though I should have known, given the f****** neighbor was mowing the lawn this morning and they never do that unless they’re having company), I mentioned this because of the pillar. The second pillar; Good personal and intimate relations, such as those of marriage, family, and friendships. Yeah, that.

    I’m grateful that what they’re doing over there, I’m not necessarily a part of, I’m also grateful that I get to more or less observe. However, I’m also doing this from at least 75ft maybe 100 ft away, they’re, I think, in the back patio section of their backyard with a projector, whereas I am on the opposite side of my yard in that shed of mine.

    So first I’d like to address that I don’t get it. I get the camaraderie, the affinity for sports and friendship, I guess on the analytic perspective; I don’t get what calls to being around so many people, so many emotions. 

    And I’m well aware that I’m kind of saying this out of my ass, as the simple fact is I came from a family of seven, with a s*** ton of people on both sides. I love the family reunions, and I love family get togethers, so why is the idea of a bunch of friends getting together to watch a sport something I cannot equate? To me, just the idea of it, makes me uncomfortable.

    Hearing the blase type of conversation, heavily supporting one team member to another foe of said team, supportive affirmations and talks back and forth. It doesn’t stimulate my mind and I hate that it doesn’t. What bothers me, is not that I think anything less of them, I just don’t get it, and I used to. I used to play sports, loved playing sports, nowadays the sensation and feelings are just not there. I’d rather watch a show with someone, have a riveting debate over thought and perspective. And I get that this idea that does excite, can translate to a parallel of what I’m questioning, so what has me cringe at the hoots and hollars of praise for a game won?

    Maybe, it’s sad, maybe it sucked, maybe it’s just not something that’s interesting to me. I don’t know but it’s still something that has me wondering if I’m broken.

    I can’t help but laugh at that, near hysterically, I am broken, in a literal health sense; I am.

    The game is won, some apparently lost, though they didn’t play, I question this connection, it’s just a game. Right? And how did someone lose, being on the back patio of a friend, watching a game? It’s rhetorical. I just smile and shake my head.

    This is the surprising factor, where, and what changed in my life, that I’m unmoved and only question how?

    I continue to smoke, listen to the recaps of game plays, retorts to fans of the losing team, the jeering from the winning team fans, and inquiries for more drinks, more smoke, more, and more.

    Maybe this is loneliness; perhaps this is depression, feeling isolated, withdrawn, sad, f***.

    Whoa, okie-dokie, this is something to get a bit more investigative here and peel back at what I’m questioning and why, I guess.

    Finding some resolve for my second pillar is going to take time. Lots…

    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. Thank you for the support, I do know I have Forget-Me-Naught Pt. 4, it’s being edited and will be
    in the morning as will more art and poetry. Thank you and may the day carry you swiftly and gently.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Four, May 13th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Forgive my losing track for a moment or two. Still very much on Pillar One taking a bow with it, and moving on to Pillar Two; Good personal and intimate relations, such as those of marriage, family, and friendships…has me feeling…well like this. ⬇️

    https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2012/05/03/151928781/the-scream-fetches-highest-price-ever-for-a-work-of-art

    This is a challenge, to say the least; I know so few, and the family I have near are over their heads in things to be done, surely exhausted and likely wanting time to themselves more than together. And of course this is an assumption, but I come with a weight. I’m the house spouse, at least as of late, and having lost the last two due to the MS makes the trials of finding a new and good job that much more difficult. That said, I come with but company, and conversation, a touch of art, some story telling, maybe.

    Here’s the thing, something happened a little over a year ago probably longer actually, that disrupted my comfort, and has in essence created a variation of me that is more than fearful just being outside. And I don’t mean being outside in the backyard with the dogs, I mean being out, I just went to the store on a walk, and the entire time had this nervous anxiety that followed. A pressure and fear that if I saw someone and they wanted to hug, talk, if not my wife, I better just walk away as fast as possible.

    That wasn’t me, I know we are destined to change, and I encourage change, I challenge you to change to be a better person as a matter of fact. Which is why I have this blog. That’s why I’ve been writing. And what I’ve noticed in just the last month addressing health and wellness for the first pillar of Jung’s, there comes a great lamenting in realizing there are so many parts to who we are in ourselves, that when you find these bits and pieces that you’ve destroyed or you’ve let others destroy of you, it changes the variables. And it makes life extremely easy to retreat, become a hermit, and the agoraphobia is more and more enticing than it should be.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning you beautiful souls, good morning and good night. May the day be ever joyous, and may the night carry you swiftly and gently through the night.

    Enjoi !!!

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Three, May 12th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Ever see that episode from Twilight Zone with the coin standing?

    It is a favorite of mine, one that has just the right amount of humor, the right amount of romance and a great ending. The story is of a simple character Mr. Hector B. Poole who happens to flick a quarter in for his daily newspaper. However, at the moment of the quarter landing in the box for pay, it’s found standing. Not budged, unfazed, resolute. Hector thinks nothing of it. He continues on…but finds a miraculous gift that he can hear the thoughts of others.

    It is an enthralling tale of heroism and mettle, one that always happens to bring a smile when I find it on. That said I’ll not share any more in hopes you take to watching it on Paramount+, maybe Tubi, or MeTV a favorite of mine.

    “A Penny for Your Thoughts” – Photo, courtesy of Paramount+, Viacom

    The reason I bring the show and the specific episode is to question.

    One, have you happened to see the episode? Two, any chance you’ve found a moment so similar that it calls for a camera and post, or take notice and share? Three, were you secretly hoping you’d have Hector B. Poole’s curious but momentary gift? What would you have done?

    On a personal account, I’ve been a lucky duck a time or two with a coin, finding it standing so resolute. And gosh I hoped, fingers crossed, eyes squeezed tight with a deep hope to hear the thoughts of others, especially as a young one, the thoughts of being able to know it all seemed nothing but magnificent.

    It happened the other day, the coin standing, out in the shed, why I had a coin in a place there’s no need, I couldn’t tell you, but it happened. And I thought but for a second, ‘I should take a shot of this and share it with someone…’, but I digressed and went about in my present moments continuing on, doing whatever it was, likely petting my scruffy Lobo and Oreo.

    I came with a resentment though, I came with a harrowing insight to what streaming, social media, and the connection to everything was doing. But of course, this stemmed from reading and not having friends. It stemmed from falling into a horror of Ellison’s, Vonnegut’s, Bradbury’s, or Clark’s. And I let it feed my animosity…now that’s been negative in some ways but beneficial in others.

    To be frank, I’m s*** with the computer, pretty crap with insta, but I’m trying to figure s*** out. The thing is I’m also trying to make sure I don’t fall into the groove of having my nose in a screen all the f****** time. I don’t want that. I love reading people’s perspectives, don’t get me wrong, I love reading the psychology of others, I love doing school online, having the grasps and capabilities to find the data and facts to hold what I’m talking about, things I like to figure out, and cherish with a wondrous splendor, especially with film and books.

    And I hope I don’t keep you long, life is too beautiful, life is too precious, going to be present. I’ll see you all tomorrow.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night!!!thank you for your support, for following and I wish you well. To the mothers, Happy Mother’s Day to mothers old and young, new and great, happy mother’s Day, though belated …Happy Mother’s Day!!

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty-Two, May 11th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Today I bring poetry, being I’d rather talk this way today as it is, I’m tired, exhausted and just getting to that point where the bubbles are starting to show at the base of the filled pot.

    Islands

    By: M. R. Vega

    The lanes of two, parallel, incessant, a call to demand for stimulation, a quiet silence of being apart.

    I see islands, so close, still distant, islands of you, islands of me, islands of difference, juxtaposed with the background of hurricane season. I see islands.

    The rolling, a thrashing to the waters, take a slice, take to splice, to us, nearing to the echelon, it brings the rungs, to take to level, where we may meet in the middle.

    The islands still I see, far apart, yet still so near. A bridge to carry the thoughts of the heart to one another, if only, it was only, but so, so, so long ago.

    Islands, Islands, beneath that surface, there stands a toppled bridge, see what takes the turbulent whirlpools, contemplate this placid and lacquered finish, let it keep its place, islands, and islands. Take a look.

    Find the bridge, bring the tether, let it hoist above to carry, a heart to the lips of you, bring the island, and pulse this heart, Islands, Islands. 

    I only see Islands…

    Quiet

    By: M. R. Vega

    Edited version to come later on…

    But I would like to give A massive happy mother’s Day! To all that are and will be. Thank you!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night I do apologize for one poem and one home only life calls to too many distractions sometimes in my ADHD is an issue twitch I apologize and appreciate the coming back, so thank you truly thank you.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred and Thirty-One, May 10th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    I come today with something short, brief, and encapsulating things figured and the humor or, I guess we can call it irony. But then again there’s context… A nuance to the whole of what I share today. So to start with I was an odd kid, I had friends most definitely, some were decent, some were brief, others ruinous. And oddly the memories are not of friends, the thing I’m going to talk about today it’s not connected to the friends that were my age, which I find odd.

    The thing is though once middle school started I noticed that it was more than easy to talk to an adult, it was easier to convey the perspective and the ideas with those that were not my peers…hahaha, though there were a handful of people the same age that somewhat got it, somewhat understood the humor or direction of what the conversation entailed. But for some odd f****** reason when it came to talking to teachers especially the English ones, talking was effortless.

    It was the start of actually feeling like I was in the skin I belonged in. There was this ability in being able to relate with something outside of me and the understanding of the nuances within storytelling, the riveting displays of character, theme, environment, sociological elements, psychological barriers that created such variables to the telling of each story through growing up, this became more and more exciting.

    Once High school came I was able to find two very inspiring and motivating people. Of course, they were both English instructors. They aired to building up my own collection, curious endeavours, great reads, and unexpected journeys.

    Now here is the thing they both taught, both nearing an identical phrasing and a sentimental variation which was this: Write everyday, no matter what, at least 3,000 words a day.

    It took me a minute, took a couple of years as a matter of fact, but finally I’ve grasped the flow that fits and I manage close to 4,000 words give or take a couple.

    I’m grateful for this teaching, grateful for what it’s brought to me in keeping creative, dreaming, and sharing the ideas that come at a whim. I don’t know what day of the hundred and thirty something that we’re at today, but I’ve made mention of following my dream and doing everything I can to at least maintain a partial grasp if not a good and prevalent grasp to that dream. So I share, and I will continue to write, in hopes that like most people who are here on WordPress we hope that we affect and help at least someone. Even if it’s just one. So to you I thank you.

    Write. Write to the heart’s desire and be you, don’t shy away from who you can be, trust it, don’t squander your soul. It deserves more, give it the time.

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May the serenity of that voice that comes in on the last track for the playlist shared, I hope you take that with your heart today and I hope that your morning, day, and the night cherishes your heart and your wants.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Thirty, May 9th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    How is the day? How was your night before?

    I didn’t dig into myself to be honest this week, as a matter of fact, I’ve been doing some decompression techniques, like painting, meditation through music and using Google’s Balance® and trying to stay quiet. I had just figured that instead of leaning into my worries, why not ignore them?

    Which in a sense, it is managing the first pillar but I didn’t take to account that within my postings. Life sometimes distracts, acts as a yielding sign protruding from a most obvious position, and still I drift.

    But like yesterday, I did take accountability to the morose degree afflicted through what and how I’ve been writing. And I think I am going to share this…art, an art project I’m still trying to finish, though, if it wasn’t for my son’s crushing hands with the clay I’d be a tad farther than I am. I hope you enjoy, will be posting to Pops.dreamd4rk on insta as well, and likely going to be starting an ADHD/MS journey with my art there as well as my psychological variables here… we’ll see how it goes.

    Art (in production) – by: M. R. Vega

    Face 1 (poly clay baked, etched)
    Face 2 (poly clay baked, etched)
    More pieces being created with Poly clay
    Organizing structure, added additional clay pieces post bake, arranging, arranging, what’s going to work?
    Up close position of Bose, after pour paint
    Teeth for face 2, painted, zoom in
    Teeth for face 1, painted with pour paint
    Stage 6/7, still in production. (About 8 hours of work all together so far.)
    Hmmm? How much of the pour paint should be seen, how  much of the characters? Decisions, decisions.

    There is still more to come, the idea is to integrate the faces into the canvas enough that it comes off more than the characters are trying to burst through. To which, if we wanna get into art, here’s my thoughts:

    Can you tell, I’m trying to land on my feet?

    I love it, hopefully that’s an obvious aspect. But in honest reflections, I don’t like perfection and care more for something that gives a decent analytical value to the person who is creating it.

    There’s something about nature though, for myself that captivates my heart in that I’ve gained a beneficial perspective to what I want to capture with my art and what I care to contain within, whether it be my eyes, and the memory bank of visuals, but more than, I love with nature the present moment and being with nature for that moment. So I try not to share those moments, I try not to touch nature and/or painting it as I like it how it is, transient, perpetually available for my senses, all six, and this is a connection I try to maintain. So…I share the personal, the isolation of reality for myself, so I’ve taken to detailing my internal struggles and life with that and what I create. I feel it holds a perspective that enriches an understanding to the whole, for the blog, the site, my health and the writer I am.

    An introduction to what inspires:

    A favorite of mine, for reference would be Michael Hussar. I will leave a link to his IG page, I respect his hand and would rather not taint his work with my page, I don’t want to offend. But I do advise to click the link and check out his creations.

    https://www.instagram.com/michael_hussar?igsh=MXAxa2p0NDFybm1xZA==

    I love the flaws within the beauty captivated in each character shared of his, there’s a harrowing detail and viciousness with each and I think it’s wonderful in a descriptive manner. The vile nature of each subject, or at the least, most, captures the darkness of the deepest parts within each human shown. There’s something raw, and very much grasping the degradation of humanity captured that I tend to enjoy. It’s not the misery, it’s not the horror that I enjoy though, it’s the truth to the image.

    This is something I look for most artists that I favor, I like the accountability to making errors, having flaws, and being themselves. To be and show oneself, even when struggling, falling apart, or building back up, I feel creates an ideal person. Be yourself, be true, and share the honest humanity of what we are, if not for any reason but that we’re alive, that we’re here, that we can create.

    Anyhow, I’m more than late and need so many things to be finished by the weekend. Signing out til the ‘marrow.

    ENJOI!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May the day be bliss, and the night cherished. Thank you for the support and continued reading. See you tomorrow.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty Nine, May 8th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Are you light or are you the darkness?

    It’s a curious question, especially with little or no context clues to be had, this I know. But the question is still here, as well as the conversation if ever there can be one…(**The writer says wanting a response, knowing likely, no)…but do you ever look within? Do you question the moral and ethical value that is brought to each moment? Or is it something that depends on the occasion?

    I ask because I get the questioning, I get the fit throwing, panel pummeling, agony inducing stressors that call to us seeing a need for change, a halt to being what makes us comfortable, or a wanting to rid the adversity that leaves us, you, and all with the debate. Are the choices light or issued more toward a darkness…?

    I’m in my 30s feeling like to I’m nearing my 50s. Begging to be reborn to something new, something refreshed and meaning to make myself what I want, but there comes that initial question I brought. Will it be light or an issuing of darkness.

    The thing is…we each affect the world. As a matter of fact we’re human, and given the homophone of effect and affect, given the circumstances, I feel they pair well with the confusion they bring.

    We’ve seen it, the argument within the rhetoric of the political scene, these but seemingly innocuous words from one source or the other, bring a rain of force, fear, love, anguish, dread, support, balance, affirmations, dedications, salutations of a degree. Take your pick. Take the perspective that suits you well.

    But see what I’m getting at, through the uses of ethos, pathos, and logos, the emotional bantering of the heart and soul of our humanity effect/affect carry hand and hand. We’re too involved for it to not be.

    A lot on my mind, a lot still to do, life, oooh oh oh, life.

    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May the day be a blanket of peace for you and the night cradle you to the dreams of splendor.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty Eight, May 7th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Life, individuation, sorry I’m so late to the post drop. F****** life, just manages to shift focus, has the kind scrambled and me really trying to make sure I end with an A for this final with the course… Now here’s the thing.

    It’s three pieces, a short story, an analysis of short story and character development and discussion, the second, addressing the Gettysburg address, four lines, analyze, describe and share with an annotated location of language, stanzas and what have you, the third an expose on why short stories are the objective, why they h mean so much and in doing detail the meaning of Edgar Allen Poes thoughts on the discussion of the short story.

    Easily done, truly, not all that daunting and it’s exciting…

    But, did I ever mention throughout my daily spills that Ocrevus can bring depression? It’s a warning, I know it, and I’m finally addressing that it’s got me at the moment, weeks actually, coming to terms with that and acknowledging it is making it easier but to keep my head up, to stay positive is asking a lot and as I’ve said time and again, I’m f****** tired.

    How it Feels

    By M. R. Vega

    The morning comes with a whipping latch for the bones within. A heated flurry, a whisper of worry, but the rhythm of our flows discombobulate the mind.

    Don’t worry, this too shall pass. Let these lies be grasped tightly, shoved and inhaled down, down to rectify the pain, to revive a fire long expelled, long dried, ashen, and…Gone.

    Contrary to the burning letters inside this obstacle course of what I call my temple, contrary to the belief all is fine, the pages tatter, they flutter to fly, to fail, to die.

    Come with me, take a minute within to find a resolute shame, to find the broken and take to it some tape, trap in what’s left, to it be kept for this, to be shared before it’s long gone. To be burned to an ashen whisper of a previously rebuked hope, let it become ash, it’s where we came, where we belong.

    Life…sometimes it’s a convoluted mess that takes days to untangle.

    However I am excited to share some art and upcoming projects I hope are appreciated here.

    IDEA #1
    Needs massive change IDEA #2
    IDEA #3
    IDEA #4
    IDEA #5
    IDEA #6
    Plans of making more face parts and we’ll see…🤔🤔🤔

    We’ll see likely over the weekend and I’ll get back to pillar one tomorrow. Sorry for this being so damn late.

    C’est La Vie

    Goodnight and good morning, good morning and goodnight. May the day be bliss, may the night bring joyous splendor of dream fueled delight.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Seven, May 6th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Since I’m coming with a Jungian philosophy and I love me a good quote here and there I figured let’s bring in some focus.

    To start; a quote from the great philosopher:

    “Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” –Carl Jung

    I personally, I feel that we do both. There is a grasp to the awakening for the cognizant aspect of what life is, but I also share a likened dreaming that I think our minds are designed to create. Maybe it’s to be a stoking fire, something raging and igniting a wanting to the things that are just out of reach.

    But that’s the thing life is perplexing. And it’s not just black and white, it’s a kaleidoscope whirled dreaming of bliss and wondrous color, isn’t it?

    Let us look inside though, I’ve been intending on dropping a post earlier in the day, however I had some painting today for a Wonka day coming up and that’s outside of my scope for what is here.

    Some things are meant to be private, right?

    It’s maddening chaos at times, the piles of things build and build with the time being an incessant groaning tuck always tick-tock, tick-tock.

    It leaves a desire for a self  meditation/soothing which calls to deep sit downs with music. As much music as I can plug into. I love the nuances of the lyrics, the inflections of desire, vile disgust, pandering love spurting from the seams, these things rule my bones with a desire to understand humanity. To listen to the voices around and soak in their thoughts, but the time…the f****** time, hmmm, never seems to be enough…or I hold myself to a standard of question and undecided direction that has me spinning, spinning, and spinning til I’m sick of it.

    This is why the music is shared. I call to you to take on the task of reading what I write and tying it to the music shared, how it connects like a the knot that’s in my head. It is like this…or this is an example. I think of painting, brings thoughts of canvas, thoughts of Basquait, makes me think of Goeth, makes me think of Cummings, makes me think of Vonnegut, makes me think of Jung’s Pillars, makes me think of aliens in Vegas, makes me think of Dizzee Rascal, makes me think of a thumping, a rumbling makes me think I need water.

    If it explains the times, the rhetoric, the flow, I hope it does.

    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night you beautiful souls. I truly do thank you for the support. I hope I can bring an encouraging for one another, supporting one another, thank you very much everyone.

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Six, May 5th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Cleopatra’s eye.

    It’s a shared moniker for that of a breakfast meal, typically known as a toad in the hole.

    Unknowingly I’ve been calling it Cleopatra’s eye since before I met my wife, and as a matter of fact it’s one of my favorite breakfast to make for the simple fact that it’s more than easy and it gives me an excuse to use in a ridiculous amount of butter because let’s be real, butter is delicious. And yes, to anybody reading, it does also share the name with what V makes for Evie in that of V for Vendetta; a wonderful Dark Horse/DC Graphic novel.

    Even though my intentions today was to talk about the initial set plan for the coming week Monday through Friday. But when looking up Cleopatra’s eye, making sure I was sharing appropriate details, I found not food but NGC 1535; a planetary nebula in the constellation Eridanus.

    This Hubble image shows NGC 1535, a planetary nebula located 5,500-7,500 light-years away in the constellation of Eridanus. Image credit: NASA / ESA / Bond et al. / Gladys Kober, NASA & Catholic University of America.

    Now I wasn’t necessarily dismayed, more just a bit perplexed that the entire time, since childhood I’d associated Cleopatra’s eyes to a salty and buttery, deliciously cholesterol fulfilling fuel. The thing is I’m a very big fan of space, very big fan of the James Webb telescope, Hubble telescope, NASA, and for some f****** reason I didn’t have Cleopatra’s eye connected anywhere to space. Just my tummy. Sorry about that.

    Anyhow diet has changed a little bit and having to do with the Cleopatra made I just like to share that making it with gluten-free bread is key or a dense type of bread. You want want the soggy bread later. Two slices and using a cookie cutter to slice the hole where you’re going to put the egg in, do an additional slice where you can put the egg white, if wanted. This gives the opportunity to have one egg yolk, protein jacked type of meal with the nice addition of an egg white as its own counterpart. It is delicious and I would suggest it would go great with either ham or bacon. I had sausage, not bad just not a very big fan of sausage unless it’s Italian sausage from Passkey. 😁

    Anyhow I apologize, today is weird, I have so many writing projects on my f****** table, or is it play or the magnitude of it I guess it would be a table cuz, well, no the plate now it’s already overflowed.

    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. I do thank you all for the support, the continued coming back to read again and again. I do wish you well, I do wish you peace.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Five, May 4th, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    And may the fourth be with you.

    Sorry, hahaha, a cheeky move, I know, but, it is a thing and if my collection was ever shared on here of the Lego sets, well maybe one of these days.

    We’ll see.

    Hmmm. 🤔 That phrase, “we’ll see”, it stirs something within, not an anger of sorts, something remembered salted and ruined, just something sour, a bit of iron graces the corners of my tongue. Or did I just bite?

    It does have a hint of sinister resolve, a personal and resolute type of adage that keeps me alert. It has the senses tightened.

    The coming week I’m going to be practicing the previous things mentioned like yoga, diet, meditation, and continued planning with health and mental wellness but will also be trying to post a morning and nightly post. These will be about how the practices of meditation and other things impacted or taken away from other insights, learnings and steadiness grasped or lost. Like that of school work focus, art focus, or if doing any of this, all of this, will increase a wanting, a bringing that resolve to finding peace with the first pillar.

    Through just the last couple of weeks there is this daunting reality that I’m finding a bit hard to handle, a bit of a struggle due to the isolation? And though I know that isolation isn’t intentional in malicious, it’s definitely affecting my person and I do not appreciate that. So I’m going to try to start reaching out to my brother’s a little bit more and my friend John and see what I can do about building that up a little bit. Luckily what I do like is I have here to decompress, relieve that stress, and share with anybody out in the world who is looking for something to grasp a hold of, or to look; “oh hey, I’m going to do everything that person isn’t or is.” If it helps, great, right?

    Don’t forget Part 3 of Forget-Me-Naught will be dropping Sunday/Monday  with Detective Milton’s playlist. Monday art and a few other things will be coming this week. Thank you everyone.

    Enjoi!!!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning good night may your day be ever bright and may the night be careful. Thank you for your support thank you for following please share and have a joyous day.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Four, May 3rd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Life, individuation, the first pillar, Jung, my head, Jung, again, my head, Jung , Jung, Jung, look a wall.

    Today, well, it’s a day where I’m going to take a moment to myself and reflect while I share some poetry and a playlist of favorites from Spotify. Enjoi!

    Seashells

    I remember the seashells, I remember the cold surface cupped against my ear, my mother asking if I can hear… If I can hear an ocean deep.

    I remember the seashells, I remember the cold surface, an echoed hollow of something distant, something nearing being forgotten, I remember.

    I remember the seashells, that cold surface, and a question that came with a known white lie, I remember nodding to a sound I didn’t know, something distant, something but forgotten, I remember.

    I remember the seashells, but it’s something new, something small, I remember the seashells and their distant whisper of lyrics sung but only to me, I remember a different shell, this with sound, I remember.

    M. R. Vega

    Change

    Calm the solutions, claim to negligence, absolve the blame.

    The furrow of furies, a billowed worry, the calm to recoiled delights

    Shame the differences, accuse the anguish, flavors missed, the ears suppressed. Mute. Mute. Mute and Scream.

    M. R. Vega

    Fuzzy Fury

    Confusion.

    I was here, now I’m gone, but then I was here again. Wait. What? I was here, now I’m gone, but then again I was here. Again.

    A testament to this in a breaking brain, how the routine, disarray of the ADHD, a fragmented space of matter, missing, chunks, white, evanesce, to blank, the gray, eroded, the black, gone, gone, gone.

    My favorites!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning

    NOSCE TE IPSUM

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Three, May 2nd, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    The last few nights I’ve found myself just staring off. I’ll kiss the wife good night, tuck in my son beside her. I say goodnight to the both of them, lay down on my small cot, and stare off to the droll of the darkness, and this has been happening for days, maybe even weeks now. I’m certainly losing track of time.

    The other day I went to bed at 1:30 in the morning, woke up at 4:00 a.m., wide awake, having to somewhat force myself back to sleep but it’s not sleep it’s more just a fruitless, fretting, tossing, turning, and that’s not the first of that type of sleep, it’s been like this for years now.

    And this, my reader, is the biggest reason why I’ve come wanting to address Carl Jung and the Five Pillars of happiness. I’ve been rather ignorant with my understanding of what depression is, trying to address it as though I’m just moody, I’m just not feeling well, under the weather, but that hollow sensation is right there. I would love to say that it’s fleeting, that it’s not a concern, that I am okay. But that’s a laugh, innit?

    Before I close out and drop my playlist which isn’t all that long, as a reader what are your five pillars of happiness for you? One of my biggest which I have yet to address and will likely be addressing next week will be art, writing, and making sure to attribute those two things to balancing the issues at hand. Of course this will take time to address, to acknowledge, to delegate, and understand but I hope through sharing art, sharing perspectives, sharing more of the whole, the idea of who and what Dream Dark Stories is going to be will come.

    Hand drawn, I figured AI had to go.
    What I Made…
    …through the night…
    …staring off into the darkness, using the TV light to mold and blend.
    Enjoi!

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. I do hope you well, hope the day is blissful and the night gentle. Stay safe.

    Nosce Te Ipsum

  • Day One Hundred & Twenty-Two, May 1st, 2024

    Hi-ho and hello.

    Yesterday I talked about coincidence, coincidence and the causal aspects of life that have us looking at circumstances thinking that it can’t be anything but a coincidence. So I thought of it, I thought of the coincidences, thought of life, thought of my circumstances, and came to think that maybe it’s a good thing Jung didn’t do more studies on coincidence. Maybe it’s a good thing that he left it to those that would come after his passing that delved into the totality of coincidence and how we consider the truth to it or the false aspects of it.

    The biggest reason this has been in my mind, well in all honesty, as a professor of mine would like to state; it takes courage to address and acknowledge depression, or a state of fracturing within the mind space.

    I’d love to say being a parent is amazing and great and it’s super awesome and it’s super chill and I love doing it everyday.

    I’d love to have some superlatively coated, drenched in pink glitter kind of response to what it’s like being a parent. But the simple matter of fact is this, if your child isn’t typical compared to the way you feel your parenting in your upbringing in the way you kind of essentially push who you are onto your child. Not that it’s intentional not that it’s a subconscious or even a conscious effort, our kids are going to pick up on us. And if they’re smart, attentive, familiar with the human paradigm and characteristics of what we show when we’re upset, happy, frustrated, infuriated, exhausted… Then f****** great. And I mean that.

    Here’s the thing, it’s a daily, it’s an all day, everyday, you got four hours Monday through Thursday, where you have time enough to either take care of the things you personally want to take care of, or take care of the household things that need to be taking care of, one or the other.

    And yeah that fits in one block because it deserves that one block its the truth of the matter.

    So in all honesty I’ve gotten just drained. And the MS fatigue, the MS health, the taking care of my son, taking care of school, and the last two years before all of this before I started the years daily blog posting, we’ve lost almost no more than 10 people in our family. I’m just tired.

    So I found it coincidental that the lady that we called to help our son happens to be available to help me happens to be available to help some things I think can definitely be mitigated appropriately and safely, and I think I need it and I think in honor of just mental health in my heart it would be smart.

    Now the question is this. Do I see that as a coincidence or just a circumstance that happened to work out very well?

    Enjoi #0.22

    C’est La Vie

    Good night and good morning, good morning and good night. May your day be forever gentle, sweet, and gracious.

    Nosce Te Ipsum